Saturday, May 15, 2010

Allowing her to be her

Today was Sweet Pea's first official dance recital. She had been looking forward to today for weeks.  It wasn't that she was thrilled to show us what she had learned or that she is a born performer.  Her excitement was due to the costume.  She wanted to put on that frilly pink tutu/dress thing.  She wanted to be allowed to wear makeup.  She wanted to look extra pretty.  In case we were wondering, I think we officially have a girly girl on our hands. 

Husband and my date this week was the first time in a while I had taken the opportunity to dress up.  When I was sick I did not have the energy.  I felt like I had accomplished something when I put on anything I would not wear to the gym.  In general I enjoy dressing up.  There were entire years in elementary school where I wore dresses every day.  Thankfully my mom was happy dressing me as the prissy little girl.  I would have hated her to try to change that about me.

Sweet Pea has always been highly energetic.  She prefers to play with the boys because they play more active games.  She would much rather play a rousing game of chase than sit and color.  I don't really understand that desire in her, but I respect it.  This is why I am often surprised when Sweet Pea wants to dress so girly.  It seems in opposition to her personality.  Girls who enjoy active games should like to dress as a tomboy would dress, in my own head.  Clearly my expectations are inappropriate.  Who says she can't run around the playground with the boys while looking like an adorable little girl?  I think she has found the best of both worlds.  Unfortunately, I worry that this dichotomy will backfire when she hits high school.  I suppose we will just deal with the fallout then.  I refuse to make her dress down when she wants to dress up.  I will do her the same favor my mom did me: allow her to express herself with her attire (as long as it is not inappropriate).  I am certain we will have wars in her teen years around the definition of appropriate.  For now, I am going to enjoy the cute dresses while I can.

1 comment:

  1. The first dress I ever wore (after I hit school age) was my sophomore year in high school and my mom made me. But only on the condition that I could wear my Chuck Converse All Stars with the dress. I was THE tomboy. I think Lily shares my sentiment. When she wears dresses she can't climb easily and therefore doesn't like them.
    I hope the dance recital went well and I'm sure she looked just like the sugar plum fairy

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